Today’s Blindsided Adventure was brought to you by my partner asking this exact question! Enjoy!
“What’s that noise?” Evan asked, turning his head to try to locate the source of the sound.
“We’re in the park,” Carla reminded him. “You’re going to have to be more specific.”
He heard it again. “That noise. That one,” he repeated when the rustling continued.
“Seriously? There’s kids playing over by the lake, an ice cream truck in range of three of the fields and a…what’s a gathering of swans even called?” Christian asked.
“A bevy,” Evan answered automatically. “And it’s not that. I can hear a kind of-”
“Who the fuck decided that a group of swans was called a bevy?” Christian interrupted.
“It’s a wedge when they’re in flight and listen-”
“A what? How high were these-”
“Oh, I can hear it now,” Carla said. “A kind of snuffly scratching type of- Oh. Oh, you are so…”
Evan whipped his head around. “What? What is it? Why did your voice go up at the end like that? It’s not a baby. Babies do not snuffle.”
“Cute,” Carla squeaked, reaching out to try to entice the matted but still fluffy face of the dog towards them. “Were you living in that bush? Were you? Do you want some of my sausage? Is that what you could smell?”
“Christian…what’s she doing? Why can I hear- Oh, no, no, tell me it isn’t-” Evan sneezed. “Christian! She knows I’m allergic to-”
“Who’s the cutest little fluffy-pies?” Carla cooed, encouraging the dog to inch forwards out of it’s hiding place. “Yes, that’s right. I’ve got some ham here for you too. Oh, you know what that is, don’t you? Yes, you do, who’s a good boy? Who left you out here?” she asked it, noting the raw skin where a collar had obviously once been.
“Carla, we are not-” Evan began.
“I don’t even live with you and he’s been left here. I’m not going to abandon him again,” Carla replied, stroking the dog behind its ear.
“It is handsome,” Christian admitted. “I think it’s a colly-shepherd mix. It’s…thin. I don’t want to leave it here. It’s got a scratch above its eye and there’s a missing patch of fur where its collar was, but it’s still friendly. It wasn’t born on the streets.”
“And I’m very sorry to hear that, but it still doesn’t change the fact that-” Evan sneezed again. “I’m violently allergic to-” He felt his eyes beginning to water.
“Dogs, we know,” Carla said, feeding the dog another piece of sausage. “That’s why you got Christian. But seeing as I didn’t ask to get my android, I’m going to take Woofles here as your punishment for nearly killing me. I think it’s fair.”
Evan narrowed his eyes. “I didn’t know,” he growled and heard the dog huff to his right.
“Still doesn’t change the facts. Now, Woofles and I are going to be spending some quality time together,” Carla declared, getting out her phone and firing off a text to Megan asking her to come and pick them up.
“You can’t call it Woofles,” Christian said. “You just can’t.”
“And you can’t have a dog either!” Evan insisted. “I’ll sneeze anytime I’m near you! I’m allergic!”
“Invest in some anti-histamines,” Carla grumbled, scratching under the dog’s chin. “You’ll adapt.”
“I won’t and-”
“He’ll buy a decontamination chamber for you and some lovely work clothes that you can change into before you come in,” Christian assured her. “Don’t worry.”
“I won’t,” Evan insisted.
“You will,” Christian countered.
“You will otherwise I’ll never do that trick with the-”
“I wish Woofles and you many happy years together, Carla,” Evan said, turning to face her general direction. “And I’ll talk to the planners tomorrow.”